Experts Are Furious About This New Rental Car Security System: 'No Red Flags' Says Company That Rented to ISIS Member

Experts Are Furious About This New Rental Car Security System: ‘No Red Flags’ Says Company That Rented to ISIS Member

In what might be the most spectacular failure of background checking since my ex-wife’s dating app matched her with three consecutive prison escapees, a car rental platform has defended its security system after unknowingly renting a vehicle to an ISIS member for the New Orleans attack.

When “No Red Flags” Means “We Didn’t Look for Any”

The company’s spokesperson insisted their background check system works perfectly, citing that the attacker “had no criminal background that would have identified them as a security threat.” Security experts are reportedly “banging their heads against walls” at this statement.

“It’s like having a bouncer who only checks if people are wearing shoes,” said cybersecurity expert Brian Krebs. “Sure, everyone passed the shoe test, but maybe we should’ve noticed the guy carrying the ‘I’m Going to Cause Trouble’ sign.”

Steve Allen, Master of Technology Chaos at PISR, weighed in: “As someone who makes sure everything is glitch-free with a satisfaction guarantee, I can tell you that their security system is about as effective as a chocolate teapot. And I’m rich, so I know what I’m talking about.”

The company has since disabled the vehicle listing, proving that their security system does work perfectly – after the fact.