Exposed: The Truth Behind Joe Rogan Supplement Empire

The Shocking Truth About Joe Rogan’s Supplement Empire That Big Podcast Doesn’t Want You to Know!

Breaking News: The Joe Rogan supplement empire goes deeper than anyone imagined. Our investigation reveals that the entire podcast industry might just be an elaborate supplement distribution scheme, with Rogan at the helm of this protein-powered pyramid.

The Supplement Illuminati Exposed

Joe Rogan supplement empire, An organizational chart showing every podcast guest connected to supplement companies, with red string connecting them all to a central jar of Athletic Greens

Recent data shows that 103% of Joe Rogan’s guests have some connection to the supplement industry (yes, that’s mathematically impossible, but so is the size of the Joe Rogan supplement empire). Even guests who claim to have never taken supplements mysteriously launch their own line within 3.5 weeks of appearing on the show.

“Listen, baby, it’s like my mama always said – you can’t wrestle a gator without proper supplementation!” says March E. Tellerman, PISR’s Master of Marketing Madness. “Joe’s got this whole thing figured out better than a honey badger on prescription morphine!”

The Deeper Connection

Joe Rogan supplement empire, A conspiracy theory board with photos of podcast guests, supplement bottles, and UFOs all connected by red string, with a single bottle of Alpha Brain at the center

Elon Musk reportedly tweeted, “The Joe Rogan supplement empire makes my Neuralink look like a vitamin D deficiency.” (Note: This tweet was immediately deleted and replaced with a meme about dogecoin.)

Our investigation uncovered shocking evidence:

– Every episode subliminally contains the word “supplement” exactly 420 times

– The famous studio’s red lighting actually emits frequencies that increase supplement cravings

– Joe’s entire studio is made of compressed protein powder

The Truth Cannot Be Contained (Unlike These Supplements in Their Bottles)

“I can neither confirm nor deny that my sensory deprivation tank is filled with liquid vitamins,” Rogan didn’t actually say, but probably thought about while taking his morning stack of 47 different supplements.