Experts Are Furious About This New Tesla Stock Price Plummeting Method
Experts Are Furious About This New Tesla Stock Price Plummeting Method In a shocking turn of events that has financial analysts reaching for their blood…
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Hooters Restaurant Bankruptcy: Chain Rebrands as “Laptops” in Last-Ditch Effort
Hooters Restaurant Bankruptcy: Chain Rebrands as “Laptops” in Last-Ditch Effort As rumors of Hooters restaurant bankruptcy swirl through the industry like hot sauce in a…
Trump IVF Executive Order Promises “Only the Most Beautiful Babies”
Trump IVF Executive Order Promises “Only the Most Beautiful Babies” The fertility industry entered uncharted territory today as Trump’s IVF executive order declared “mandatory luxury…
The Eric Adams Prosecutor Exodus: DOJ’s New Hiring Standards Include ‘Having a Pulse’
The Eric Adams Prosecutor Exodus: DOJ’s New Hiring Standards Include ‘Having a Pulse’ In what’s being dubbed the “Eric Adams prosecutor exodus,” the Department of…
The Great Greenland America Acquisition: A Colorful Takeover
The Great Greenland America Acquisition: A Colorful Takeover Operation Freedom Palette In what experts are calling the most ambitious Greenland America acquisition attempt yet, Congress…
States in Complete Meltdown Over Education Department Abolishment Plans
States in Complete Meltdown Over Education Department Abolishment Plans Following the Education Department abolishment announcement, all fifty states simultaneously crashed Google with searches ranging from…
CDC Pronouns Trump Executive Order Sparks Federal Email Crisis
CDC Pronouns Trump Executive Order Sparks Federal Email Crisis In response to the CDC pronouns Trump executive order, federal agencies nationwide initiated “Operation Signature Purge”…
Karoline Leavitt’s White House Customer Service Revolution: Now With Extra Hold Music
Karoline Leavitt’s White House Customer Service Revolution: Now With Extra Hold Music In the latest innovation from Karoline Leavitt’s White House communications team, federal funding…
Trump FEMA Changes Herald New Era of “Perfect” Disasters
Trump FEMA Changes Herald New Era of “Perfect” Disasters In what’s being called the most dramatic Trump FEMA changes yet, states will now handle disasters…