God is Real – Unisex Hoodie

Description

“Oi, nocturnal nudists and frosty friskers!

Prepare to swoon and sweat! Introducing the Unisex “”Hide Your Hickeys”” Heavy Blend Hoodie. Remember those questionable decisions made on those cool evenings? Now you’ve got the perfect cover-up!

You asked for a spot to stash your contraband snacks and embarrassing secrets, and we delivered with a front pouch that’s more spacious than your last relationship’s emotional baggage. And oh, the drawstrings? They’re not just for show; they’re to tighten up when reality gets too close for comfort.

Let’s get into the juicy bits, shall we?

-50% pre-shrunk cotton, 50% polyester. That’s right, it’s like a mullet – business in the front, party in the back.
-Fabric weight: 8.0 oz/yd² (271.25 g/m²) – heavier than your commitment issues.
-Air-jet spun yarn. Feels softer than a politician’s promise and sturdier than your alibis.
-Double the trouble with a double-lined hood. Plus, matching drawcord for when you’re feeling all matchy-matchy.
-Quarter-turned body, because nobody likes a middle crease. Except maybe origami enthusiasts?
-1 × 1 athletic rib-knit. Perfect for when you’re athletically watching Netflix.
-Sexy cuffs and waistband spiced up with spandex. S-T-R-E-T-C-H it out, baby.
-Front pouch pocket: big enough to hide your embarrassing 90s mixtape.
-Double-needle everywhere because if it’s worth doing, it’s worth overdoing.

Exotic? Oh, yes. Straight from the sizzling lands of Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, or El Salvador. Because why source from one place when you can make it a party?

So why the wait? Wrap yourself in scandal, comfort, and a touch of “what were you thinking?”. Remember, each hoodie is baked to perfection just for your scandalous adventures. Jump on it! 🖤🔥🍿🎉”

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!