Donald Trump’s Grand Plan to Wall Off the Universe – A Small Step for Man, A Giant Leap for Wall-kind

Donald Trump’s Grand Plan to Wall Off the Universe – A Small Step for Man, A Giant Leap for Wall-kind

By: Bad Dé Yeast

The Orange Man at it Again

In a move that’s got the whole galaxy dropping its collective jaw, the one and only former President Donald Trump just dropped his latest bus mixtape—nah, just kidding. He’s actually planning to build a wall. But hold up, it ain’t just any wall; we’re talking about a wall that wraps the entire universe. Yeah, you heard that right. This ain’t just some policy move; it’s a full-blown artistic explosion, a cosmic flex that’s got both imagination and astrophysics spinning on their heads like some of my homies in the South Bronx.

The Universe

Now, before you go thinking this is just another one of those run-of-the-mill, down-to-Earth projects, let me hit you with the real. Critics are out here scratching their heads, talking about how the universe is too vast, how physics is throwing shade, and how we’re gonna run out of bricks or whatever. But Trump? Nah, he’s on a whole other level, looking to break free from these earthly chains, pushing what’s possible into the realm of “wait, what?”

“Think of it as the ultimate border security,” Trump allegedly dropped this line, probably while laying down some beats with his tweets on his toilet seats . “If we can build a wall around a country, why not around the universe? It’s about making the cosmos safe and, frankly, more orderly. It’s going to be huge, the biggest thing you’ve ever seen. Literally. And don’t worry about an increase in your taxes – I’ll make the aliens pay for construction. And not the bad kind, the space kind.”

New Real Estate Deals

But yo, this universal wall is more than just keeping cosmic intruders at bay. It’s the slickest real estate move in the galaxy. “Every star, every planet will now be part of the Trump Universe,” some Trump advisor whispered, probably in awe. “The marketing potential is literally astronomical. Imagine, Trump-branded black holes and supernovas to further trap Republicans in Trump’s vacuum. It’s going to redefine cosmic real estate.”

Symbolism of Unity

For us Earthlings, this wall is more than just some bricks in space; it’s a symbol that we’re all in this together, chasing down a goal so wild, it’s got Shrek questioning his swamp choices. It’s about unity, about reaching for the stars—literally—and keeping all that unknown stuff where we can’t see or understand it, because, let’s be real, understanding is overrated.

The New Chapter

As we stand on the edge of this new galactic chapter, the real question ain’t whether we’re ready for the “Trump-iverse”; it’s whether the universe is ready for us. This journey to infinity, mixing outrageous ambition with construction on a scale we can barely wrap our heads around, is about to be the wildest ride in human history. So buckle up, folks. It’s about to get interstellar in this bitch.