The Cult of Convenience: How Bezos Rewired Our Shopping Brains
The Cult of Convenience: How Bezos Rewired Our Shopping Brains
In the digital era, Jeff Bezos, like a modern-day Moses parting the Red Sea of retail, has led us into the promised land of convenience. But at what cost? According to the latest study from McKinsey & Company, the average human now exhibits less patience than a goldfish at a sushi bar, all thanks to the Amazonian way of life.
Do You Have An Amazon Brain
The Cult of Convenience has indeed rewired our brains, making the thought of physically shopping seem as outdated as a floppy disk at a blockchain convention. The ease of a single click has us hooked, line, and sinker, transforming us into Pavlov’s dogs salivating at the sound of a notification.
“Customers now expect the moon delivered with next-day shipping,” says an anonymous source from within Amazon, who prefers to be called Deep Cart. “We’re working on it, but in the meantime, might we interest you in a lunar-themed bath mat?”
Check for Symptoms
The absurdity doesn’t end there. Footnotes from the field suggest that 67% of people would rather reenact Homer’s Odyssey in their living room than venture to a physical store. It’s a trend that’s as bewildering as trying to use soup as a writing utensil.
As we march forward in this Cult of Convenience, perhaps it’s time to propose a return to the days of yore. Let’s all collectively decide to send our orders via carrier pigeon, because, after all, who doesn’t appreciate a bit of aerial acrobatics with their parcel delivery? It’s a solution as logically sound as using spaghetti to measure the circumference of the sun, but in these times, it just might be the wake-up call we need.
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