Edward Übermensch

As a proud German, I take editing seriously. So seriously, in fact, that I've been known to use my own blood as ink in my red pens. And if you have a problem with using German blood to make the world a more accurate place then I can just accuse you of being a holocaust denier. It is the internet after all. 

Our social cause products? They're top-notch and have nothing to do with the holocaust, which is good. And let's not forget about our forums promoting free speech - I make sure everything is grammatically incorrect and typo-full, even if it means sacrificing my own sanity in the process because freedom isn't free unless a kraut is punching himself in the frankfurter at work. 

And our blogs? Thanks to my keen eye for detail and lack of a sense of humor, they stay exactly how they are because of your 1st Amendment rights and my boss' insistence that I deserve to suffer for my country's sins. But if you dare to make a typo or use the wrong form of "their", you can be sure that I have a concrete fornication tool in my drawer because my ass hole has become desensitized to the ones made out of tire tread.

But hey, I'm not all calluses and grammar rules. I'm also a masochist and an alcoholic. Heil America!