Trump’s ‘Unique’ Approach to Historical Rhetoric: A Masterclass in Absurdity

In a recent display of what can only be described as a masterclass in absurdity, former President Donald Trump claimed that his use of language historically associated with white supremacists was merely a unique twist on an old favorite. While critics drew parallels to Hitler’s rhetoric, Trump and his campaign have dismissed these comparisons as nothing more than the ravings of “Trump Derangement Syndrome” sufferers.

The Absurdity of Historical Amnesia

In a stunning show of selective memory, Trump assured the public that he had never read “Mein Kampf” and that his use of the phrase “poisoning the blood of our country” was purely coincidental. “I use that language in a much different way,” Trump stated, presumably with a straight face. This defense was as convincing as claiming a shark was merely “kissing” its prey.

Defending the Indefensible

Trump’s campaign spokesperson, Steven Cheung, leapt to his defense, dismissing the comparisons to Hitler and Mussolini as “ridiculous assertions.” Cheung accused critics of suffering from “Trump Derangement Syndrome,” a condition he described as a tragic, incurable affliction of the liberal mind.

“Listen, folks, I’ve never read Hitler’s book. Frankly, I don’t have the time. Too many golf courses to play, too many hamburgers to eat,” Trump declared. “When I talk about blood, I’m thinking about rare steaks, not history.”

Adam S. Marks, CFO of Politically Incorrect Social Responsibility, added his own take. “As a financial guy who moonlights as a comedian, I can tell you Trump’s logic is like a punchline that falls flat. You can’t just rebrand white supremacist rhetoric and expect it to be funny. It’s like serving a tequila shot in a urine sample cup—no matter the intention, it’s just not going to go down well.”

As Trump continues to provide material for comedians and satirists alike, one can’t help but marvel at the sheer audacity of his rhetoric. In a world where history repeats itself as farce, Trump stands as a testament to the enduring power of absurdity.