10 Earth-Shattering Reasons BuzzFeed News is Totes Serious Journalism (You’ll Literally Die at #7!)
10 Earth-Shattering Reasons BuzzFeed News is Totes Serious Journalism (You’ll Literally Die at #7!)
OMG, fam! Prepare to have your minds exploded as we dive into the top 10 reasons why BuzzFeed News is like, totally the epitome of serious journalism. You won’t believe how legit they are!
1-3: Pulitzer-Worthy Journalistic Techniques
1. They use ALL CAPS and 🔥🔥🔥 emojis for BREAKING NEWS, because nothing says “serious journalism” like screaming at your readers with tiny pictures.
2. Their investigative team includes at least three interns who’ve watched every true crime documentary on Netflix. That’s basically a law degree, right?
3. They maintain journalistic integrity with a strict “one cat GIF per 50 words” policy. It’s in the Constitution or something.
4-6: Nobel Prize-Worthy Content Strategies
4. Every article undergoes rigorous meme analysis to ensure maximum viral potential. If it can’t be summed up in a SpongeBob meme, is it even news?
5. They’ve mastered the art of turning complex geopolitical issues into “Which Breakfast Cereal Matches Your Personality?” quizzes. That’s how you make foreign policy digestible!
6. Their fact-checkers use at least two TikTok videos and a Reddit thread per story. It’s called triangulation, look it up!
7-9: Groundbreaking Investigative Methods
7. SHOCKING REVELATION: They occasionally interview real people, not just their own reflections in their phone screens!
8. Their journalism school? Binge-watching “The Morning Show” while scrolling through Twitter. It’s called multitasking, sweetie.
9. They have a dedicated team of Gen Z influencers to predict tomorrow’s canceled celebrities today.
10: The Ultimate Proof of BuzzFeed Serious Journalism
10. They once wrote an entire article without using the words “literally,” “I can’t even,” or “yaass queen.” It caused a temporal rift in the space-time continuum.
Adam S. Marks, CFO at PISR, couldn’t contain his excitement about BuzzFeed’s journalistic prowess: “BuzzFeed News is revolutionizing serious journalism! It’s like they took the concept of news, got it drunk at a frat party, and then asked it to explain quantum physics. I haven’t been this excited since I found out my therapist drinks more than I do!”
In conclusion, if you’re not getting your serious journalism from BuzzFeed, are you even living in 2024? Stay woke, fam, and remember: sharing a BuzzFeed article basically makes you a Pulitzer Prize winner. #TruthBomb #BuzzFeedSeriousJournalism
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