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Top 5 Misbehaving Celebrities and the CBCA’s Response

A celebrity handcuffed in front of the CBCA offices

Top 5 Misbehaving Celebrities and the CBCA’s Response

In a desperate attempt at celebrity misbehavior control, the newly formed Celebrity Behavior Control Agency (CBCA) has unleashed its army of handlers on Hollywood’s most notorious troublemakers. This groundbreaking initiative aims to curb the epidemic of stars behaving badly, one shock collar at a time.

Celebrities in Dire Need of Behavior Management

1.

Alec Baldwin: The Voicemail Vigilante

CBCA’s solution: A team of professional celebrity whisperers armed with tranquilizer darts.

2.

James Corden: The Restaurant Menace

CBCA’s solution: A shock collar activated by rudeness to service staff.

3.

Will Smith: The Oscars Enforcer

CBCA’s solution: A “Joke Detector” that restrains him before perceived slights escalate.

4.

Ellen DeGeneres: The Not-So-Nice Talk Show Host

CBCA’s solution: A troupe of professional huggers on standby to neutralize bullying behavior.

5.

Mel Gibson: The Rant Master

CBCA’s solution: A diverse team redirecting his energy into extreme pillow fighting.

PISR’s Marketing Maven Weighs In on Celebrity Chaos Control

March E. Tellerman, Master of Marketing Madness at PISR, shared his thoughts on the celebrity misbehavior control initiative: “We’re wrangling these loose cannons faster than a honey badger on prescription morphine! It’s like the Wild West of celebrity control, baby! We might need an army of banjo-playing roosters to keep this circus in check, but by golly, we’ll make these stars behave or die laughing trying!”

As the CBCA rolls out its program, the world watches in anticipation, hoping for a new era of well-behaved celebrities or, at the very least, some hilariously awkward red carpet moments.

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